The Worry-Go-Round

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“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

Corrie ten Boom

 

I come from a long line of worriers.  My world was steeped in their distress.  Maybe they worried because of the events of their time… living in poverty, experiencing many wars.  Losing loved ones and friends to sickness.  Survival was their mantra.

 

But as they grew it seemed their worries only grew, never diminishing.  And that was the world I knew.  If I was sick, the worry was would I survive….of course I was sickly as a young child, born with asthma and almost died of pneumonia when I was one.  And I began to worry at an early age, as children listen and take in the feelings around them.

 

The daily messages were life sucks, nothing ever goes right, we can’t catch a break…the not-so-positive messages that were not always in your face, but presented more subtly.  So we were raised with that subliminal message to think the worst would always happen.  Maybe it was a survival technique.  If you didn’t raise your hopes, then they couldn’t be dashed too harshly.

 

But in living with these negative messages of circumstance all the time, I would never think to aim too high…I was afraid of the long fall.  And life was predetermined so just suck it up and live with the misery.  As I look back on it, I realized how sad some of those worriers were.  They did not have much of a life because they would never dare to strive for it.  And I seemed to always be settling for what was thrust upon me having no hope to make it better.

 

 

DSCN1240I am not sure when the shift happened….it was a slow turn where I would work at worrying less.  But I’d get only so far away from the Worry Road, and then something would happen.  The worry would suck me in dropping me back on the Worry-Go-Round until I was dizzy with it again.

 

But I can tell you when I was freed from the endless, needless cycle or worry.  It began when I started to slow, to just be with myself.  It continued with daily practices of meditation, leaning in to emotions and then letting them go.  When I dropped self-judgment and immersed myself in doing what I loved, I found happiness surrounded me, a beacon shining from deep within.  

 

Currently I find any worries have been pushed into my subconscious and show up in my dreams from time to time.  So when I catch these worries, I am gentle with myself as I acknowledge there is nothing to fear and then I bid it adieu.  I am not perfect with this…nor will I ever be.  It is a process to lessen the worries that will show up from time to time.  But they cannot last long as each dawn that beacon chases away any darkness that wants to linger.

 

 

As a side note….I have recently come across many readings about worry.  It was also one of the lessons I worked through during Sandra Pawula’s Mini-Mindfulness Challenge.  I liked the gentle way she approached diminishing worry.  If you have a chance check out her blog, and this wonderful set of lessons.

 

 

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Special Note:  Queen Anne’s Lace signifies haven, home, comfort; antidotes for worry.

 

 

The picture below is my gift to you this week.  Please download it and use it to spread light.

QAL-worry

 

 

All original content is copyrighted and the sole property of Donna Donabella @ Living From Happiness, 2014.  Any reprints or use of content or photos is by permission only.

 

21 Replies to “The Worry-Go-Round”

  1. I’m glad you got out of the worry cycle. I had quite a negative childhood and I found that my faith in God made me so different from the rest of the family. It’s something that separates us but I’m ok with that so I can be around positive people.

  2. Very interesting post, Donna. Like you, I am a worrier, too. And it looks like from similar circumstances as well. I had asthma as a young child, but eventually outgrew it. I remember my mother being a worrier as well. As for me, I always worried about what could or can happen before I make a decision. I feel that that’s a part of my inherent make up – to try to protect my family from hurt, etc. Except that while being a worrier, I think I’ve always had a very positive attitude and tried to not let the worrying depress me.

  3. I too am a worrier. I cross my bridges mentally before I am sure that there is a river. Sometimes it is useful. It gives me time to consider alternative plans.
    Often it is a soul sucker and a waste of precious energy. Getting better, but I need to be vigilant. A post which speaks to many of us – thank you.

  4. I so resonate with your story, Donna. I think I also have ancestral grief or worry in my bones. Like you, I don’t know how it happened exactly, but one day I woke up and realized how useless worry is. Of course, I’m not rid of it entirely but it no longer rules my life. Thanks for sharing so openly and honestly. Your story and transformation gives us all hope! And, thanks for including the link to my mini-mindfulness challenge.

  5. I ca so relate to this. I was raised with the words “you can’t” and “they won’t let you”. Took a long time and hard work to get past this mindset…and I am still working on it.

    1. Thank you Patricia for sharing your story…I am amazed and how we all seem to know this Worry-Go-Round…wonderful to hear you are working on getting rid of the worry mindset too.

  6. That would make a lovely meditation — a Queen Anne’s lace worry catcher, into which the day’s worries slowly drift and fall away, like dust carried on the wind.

  7. Just want you to know, Donna, that I love your new blog and read every post. I don’t comment, however, because my focus is gardening blogs and gardening writings. It is so easy for me to become distracted on the Web, especially the blogosphere, and spend my whole day there, when I should be focusing on my own writing: my book, my presentations, my articles, and my blog. So keep up the good work which is wonderful! Just know, that even if I don’t comment, I support all your ventures, my friend, especially this one. P. x

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