“I wonder if pain comes from surrendering or resisting?” ~Donna Lynn Hope
I have been taking stock recently of my life. This journey in retirement has been interesting, and has taught me many things so far. With a year into this journey, I am not sure sometimes if I am where I am supposed to be. I have long controlled my life. Planned, over planned and tried to wrap it up in a nice, neat bundle doing what I think I should be doing. Many times not listening to that little voice to guide me.
And in those times, life was hard, unhappy and full of pitfalls into which I fell hard. I would get up, and control things even more, resisting the path being shown usually because of fear. And inevitably pain would be a big part of my life. Along with the feeling that life was unhappy, and I would never find real joy.
And of course life is anything but nice and neat many times. I am never sure what it will bring me next. But I have noticed since I stopped controlling my life and its journey, I have been happier. It is not easy to drop what you had been doing for over 30 years, and strike out on a new path. A path not even defined, with very little direction. Just showing up each day and wondering what it is I am supposed to do, and where I am supposed to go.
I do feel like I have been drifting lately. And that drifting is okay when you need time to heal yourself. But it seems it is time now, to start contemplating what is next. And instead of trying to take control and orchestrate the life I think I am supposed to live, I have instead surrendered to the Universe. I am looking for those signs that will show me what is next…listening for that inner voice to talk with me again.
It take’s patience to surrender…another lesson I am learning. Living each day in the moment, exploring and taking a few risks. These are scary steps, but oh so much better than giving into boredom and complacency, where I tend to reside when I am afraid to move out of my comfort zone.
One of the most important lessons I have learned in surrendering, is that there is great freedom when I loosen my grip. When I let slip those tight reins I have on my life, I open my heart to joy, wonder, and infinite possibilities.
I did say this was my year to soar, flowing with and following a path shown to me in small steps. And recently I have been taking a few test flights to try out my new wings. But I think it might be time to step out a bit further, and maybe from a higher branch. To fly from this place of surrender, and have faith that I am doing the right thing. Knowing that these wings will lift me up to new places, new challenges and wonderful adventures. After all if I don’t, look what I might be missing. A whole wonderful world just waiting for me.
Note: In the Language of Flowers, grass represents submission; a synonym for surrender. These wonderful tall ornamental grasses grow in my garden every summer and bloom in the fall, finally surrendering in winter to the snow.
I leave you with another thought about surrender. Feel free to download this photo and share.
All other photos and original content is copyrighted and the sole property of Donna Donabella @ Living From Happiness, 2014-2015. Any reprints or use of other photos or content is by permission only.